Subaru: On this sunny daaaay… Um, I am Mr. Black todaaaay. Mic check. One, two. One, two. Che- fha fha. Che. Haha. Can you hear me fine Cat?
Lara: I can hear you but I’m not showing up…
Pao Lin: Click that, La-chan.
Lara: Ah! I didn’t have my camera turned on! Let me just…
Subaru: Oh I see you!
Lara: Thank god! Thank you Pao Pao!
Subaru: Hey, you can see me too, right? I’m on my phone right now.
Lara: You’re on! Don’t worry!
Pao Lin: Sup Black.
Subaru: Good work today Kid. Heh, feels weird saying hi over a video call.
Pao Lin: Now that you mention it, yeah. Also, I didn’t realize Thomas was in this remote call too.
Thomas: I was told that this was a call amongst the newly debuted heroes.
Pao Lin: That’s good to hear. Well, time for me to go.
Lara: Already? But…
Pao Lin: This is a get-together for the newbie heroes so there’s no point in me being here.
Lara: That’s true but…
Pao Lin: I’ll be around so just say something if you need me. Zàijiàn*!
Thomas: Farewell.
Subaru: Bye.
(camera turns off)
Subaru: Man, Kid is such a great senpai.
Lara: (giggles) They are! Pao Pao is my pride and joy~
Subaru: Pao Pao is your…pride and joy?
Lara: Mhnn! They may look like they have everything together, but sometimes they’re a bit careless. But that adds to Pao Pao’s charm and makes them my pride and joy!
Subaru: Huuuh.
Lara: But I always turn to Pao Pao whenever I need help so I need to be better at not depending on them as much…
Subaru: Um, don’t you think calling Kid “my pride and joy Pao Pao” is a bit weird?
Lara: Huh? Is it wei-
Thomas: Can you hurry up and start this get-together?
Subaru: Oh? Rare to see you be excited about something.
Thomas: I just want to get this call over with. I think this get-together with just the new heroes is useless.
Subaru: Yes yes, I know you do.
Lara: We’ve already started the get-together so let's enjoy ourselves, Thomas-san!
Subaru: Nice one Cat! And with that, let me officially start this get-together with a toast! Ahem! I hope this opportunity allows us to talk honestly with one another today. Uum, looking back, to us newly debuted heroes, our arrival here in the big stage of Sternbild marks the start of—
Lara: Cheers!!
Subaru: Cat?
Lara: Sorry! I just…got caught up in the excitement!
Subaru: Did I say anything exciting?
Lara: You said that we should enjoy today... And so it just came out of me~.
Subaru: It felt like you did it on purpose but…
Thomas: It’s because you’re talking too much.
Lara: Correct!
Subaru: Eh, at least you’re energetic… Is not the point! Just let me have this moment to myself! We gotta start this call on the right foot!
Thomas: Alright, then go ahead and talk freely. Uhh—
Subaru: Hey wait! Where are you going? We can see you leave! Why did you get up from your camera!?
Thomas: (distant) The broccoli is almost done boiling.
Lara: Oh! I’m gonna get some snacks too!
Subaru: You two…. Just doing whatever you want!
–
(title soundtrack Tiger&Bunny plays)
Subaru: Yo! This story takes place when we weren’t allowed to go outside because of the X and stuff. I suggested that we have a get-together with all of the newbie heroes but my partner, as always, isn’t on board with my ideas… Well, whatever happens, happens. TIGER & BUNNY 2, special audio drama, Remote Get-Together with the Newbie Heroes. Please take care of us.
–
Lara: Ta-daa! This is Lara’s kitchen!
Subaru: Wow, it’s pretty big!
Pao Lin: Sa! (punch) Sa! (punch)
Lara: Oh! Pao Pao’s kneading the dumpling dough right now!
Subaru: Wow!! Kid knows how to make dumplings!?
Pao Lin: This dumpling skin recipe is passed down through the Huang bloodline and it’s said to bring harmony to everyone in the family who eats it!
Subaru: Woooow!!
Pao Lin: You don’t need to keep showing me to them. Hurry up and show them to other places in the apartment, La-chan.
Lara: Yes! (footsteps) Then next is over here!
Subaru: Oh? The living room?
Thomas: That’s a large screen.
Lara: Right!? Pao Pao and I usually rewatch HeroTV episodes here and critique our performances.
Thomas: Clever.
Subaru: Hey you, you just thought how easy it would be to watch yourself on a big screen, didn’t you?
Thomas: Don’t ask if you already know.
Subaru: Ehe-hehe.
Lara: Past the living room is the training room and if we climb up these stairs then… Here we are! The door with the red mark on it is Pao Pao’s room, the one to the left is my room, and the room farthest left is an empty room!
Subaru: The rooms—
Lara: I won’t give you a tour of them!! They are our private spaces! And that’s it! The end to Lara and Pao Pao’s home tour!
Subaru: Nice! (clapping sfx)
Lara: Now it’s your turn, Black-san.
Subaru: My place… Is a single room, as you can see, and there’s a bed, a table… Pretty normal.
Lara: Um… What about the cardboard boxes?
Subaru: Aha well that’s…from when I moved in and never cleaned up.
Lara: Eh? But it’s been a year since we’ve been working here.
Subaru: I keep telling myself that I’ll do it, but I always “save” it for tomorrow and…
Thomas: People like that will never be able to clean up their space for as long as they’re aliv—
Subaru: No! I’m not done! I kept telling myself that I’ll leave it for tomorrow, I’ll clean it up tomorrow, and then it slowly donned on me. I was like, hmm? These cardboard boxes… They work as interior furniture!
Lara and Thomas: Huh?
Subaru: In summary, it’s not that I can’t dispose of the cardboard boxes, it’s that I choose not to dispose of them. You get where I’m coming from?
Thomas: …Well. If that’s how you want to live then.
Lara: Yes…
Subaru: You guys totally don’t get it!!
Lara: Oh! What’s that?
Subaru: Ah? What’s what?
Lara: The picture on the desk.
Subaru: Ooh. That’s a picture from when I was Hello Goodbye.
Lara: Hello Goodbye?
Subaru: It’s my hero name when I worked at a different town before coming to Sternbild.
Lara: Wow!
Subaru: When choosing my name, I was given the option of either “Hello Goodbye” or “Goodbye Hello”, and in the end, I decided on “Hello Goodbye”.
Lara: I see!
Thomas: Why those two names…
Subaru: So that pic is something I took with those guys before I left for Sternbild.
Lara: You all seem really close.
Subaru: We’ve been there for each other through thick and thin after all. Whenever I look at this picture, it reminds me that I have to work hard so these guys won’t laugh at me for doing a poor job at being a hero. It motivates me a lot.
(footsteps sfx)
Subaru: —again!? Where are you going, Thomas!? We can see you leave!!
Thomas: (distant) Sorry, but the chicken breast will become too dry to eat if it boils for longer than this.
Subaru: Gnnngngnnaaaagnn… Right when I was telling a heartfelt story…
Lara: I was listening!
Thomas: It’s part of my schedule so there’s no helping it.
Subaru: Yeah yeah, I know. I’ve seen the weekly schedule on your wall~.
Lara: Wow~ you have something like th—-
Thomas: I refuse.
Lara: —ah… I didn’t say anything!
Thomas: You were going to ask me to show it to you.
Lara: Yes.. But!
Subaru: Come on, what’s the harm in showing it to Cat? She said she wants to see it… Or I could barge into your room and show her from my camera!
Thomas: (sighs) Fine. Here.
Lara: (gasps) It’s so detailed.
Subaru: He apparently creates his weekly schedule about what he’ll eat, when he’ll sleep, and what his work out regimen will be by checking the state of his body after the previous week’s schedule. Right?
Thomas: And that’s it.
Lara: Huh! Already?
Subaru: Hey wait a moment! I only saw a smidge but your room is also filled with cardboard boxes!
Thomas: Mm…
Subaru: I saw one peeking out from the bottom when you were showing your weekly schedule! You told me that I can’t clean up after myself. I bet you’re also bad at cleaning up after yourself!
Thomas: Don’t lump us together. This box—(ruffles)—is where my protein is. I have them organized and separated so I can use them immediately after training.
Subaru: Wow, organized…
Lara: Very different from Mr. Black.
Subaru: Yeah.
Thomas: So, what’s next? We’ve all shown each other’s room. So what’s next?
Subaru: Next?
Thomas: What else is planned for today?
Subaru: Planned? Why are you so stiff…
Lara: But what should we do next…
Subaru: Mmmm, I don’t know…
Lara and Thomas: Hmm.
(silence)
Thomas: Seems like we have nothing to talk about. Then let’s end this call.
Subaru: Hey wait a moment! Don’t assume we don’t have anything to talk about! We only just started!!
Thomas: Then do you have something to say?
Subaru: I do!! Of course I do!!
Thomas: Then say it.
Subaru: It’s uuuuuuuuuuh ummmmnn hmmmm… What’d you eat yesterday?
Thomas: (sighs)
Subaru: No, I take that back! That doesn’t count! It doesn’t count so um—
Thomas: There’s no point in trying. It’s not like we share many interests to begin with.
Subaru: That’s not true! But umm… Aaaaaah, my mind is blanking out when I need it the most—
Lara: I’ve got an idea!!
Subaru and Thomas: Eh?
Lara: Let’s take a bathroom break~ And after the break we can talk some more!
Subaru: Yeah! I finished my drink so that’s perfect. Right! Right!?
Thomas: Fine. But let’s end the call if our conversation dies again.
–
Pao Lin: Sa! (pounds) Sa! (pounds)
Lara: Pao Pao! Help me!!
Pao Lin: Huh? What’s wrong?
Lara: The get-together is becoming awkward and…
Pao Lin: Eh!?
Lara: We’ve run out of things to talk about and… We’re going to end the call because it’s so awkward at this point… What should I do…
Pao Lin: But what can you do about that…
Lara: Do you have any suggestions for conversation topics? I want to get us all talking but…
Pao Lin: Mmm… Oh! Just ask them questions that have to do with being a hero!
Lara: Eh?
Pao Lin: It’s a get-together with all the newbie heroes, right? Maybe the two of them want to talk about that and raise morale!
Lara: That! That’s it!! But…what kind of questions should I ask?
Pao Lin: Anything to do with heroes.
Lara: Like?
Pao Lin: Like… Like questions pertaining to being a newbie hero, cause you guys are all newbies.
Lara: Like?
Pao Lin: Like…concerns?
Lara: More specifically?
Pao Lin: More specifically about… I’m not sure…
Lara: Not sure about what?
Pao Lin: Um…. Hey wait, why am I the one finding solutions and answering every question?
Lara: Ah? Ah!? I unconsciously expected Pao Pao to help me out again…
Pao Lin: Heehee. I don’t mind being relied on, but I think you should find out the solution by yourself at the end.
Lara: You’re right! But this should be plenty since I have a starting point!
Pao Lin: If anything happens, I’ll definitely come to your help. So good luck!
Lara: Thank you!
–
Thomas: Everyone’s here now. Break time’s over.
Subaru: Then… Who wants to go first?
Lara: Me me me!! I have a question!!
Subaru: Oh! Go for it Cat!
Lara: I want to hear you two talk about being a hero!
Subaru: Talk about being a hero?
Lara: Like, when did you become a hero or when did you decide that you wanted to become a hero. Stuff like that!
Thomas: I don’t mind answering but I’ve already answered these types of questions during interviews so you won’t be learning anything new.
Lara: Umm then… What about this? What did you buy with your first hero paycheck?
Subaru and Thomas: Huh?
Lara: I remember being excited when I received my first hero paycheck because it was the first paycheck I had ever earned in my life.
Subaru: And what did you use it for?
Lara: Hehe, I took my mom out to a restaurant! She’s the reason why I became a hero after all, so I had promised that I would spend it on her!
Subaru: Woooow.
Lara: But mom is annoying about having a proper diet so every time a new dish came out, she’d ask the waiter how many calories it was or how many grams of sodium were in there and stuff.
Subaru: Haha sounds like the rumored mom alright.
Lara: But I’ll never forget my mom’s face from that night. She looked so happy and… I’m glad I was able to take her out to dinner.
Subaru: Sounds like it was fun.
Lara: Now Black-san! What did you use your first paycheck on?
Subaru: Me? I also used my paycheck on my family. It’s not like I’ve never received a hero paycheck cause I used to work as Hello Goodbye, but I did think about taking my family out to dinner like Cat however… I don’t know, it’s kinda embarrassing to go out to dinner with my family.
Lara: Why is it embarrassing!?
Subaru: Eh, you’ll understand when you get older. And so, what came to my mind while I was brainstorming was… A life size figure of Hello Goodbye!
Lara: A figure of yourself…?
Thomas: And a life size one on top of that…
Subaru: I wanted to let them know that I was able to grow up to be this big because of their help.
Thomas: But they see you all the time. They can tell that just by looking at you.
Subaru: And they said the same thing you just said… Then they yelled at me for wasting my money…
Lara: It’s very much like you, Black-san.
Subaru: It made for a good memory at least.
Lara: Then next is Thomas-san. What did you use your first paycheck for?
Thomas: I…mmn…still haven’t used it…
Lara: Eh?
Thomas: So I’m sorry to say but I don’t have any good memories or anything to tell you two.
Lara: But…
Thomas: Also, can we go into another break? It’s time for me to eat my nuts.
Lara: Oh…. Okay…
(sfx of camera turning off)
Lara: Black-san? Did I say something that upset Thomas-san?
Subaru: Eh, it’s just part of his schedule…(silence) Anyway, Imma hop to the toilet.
(sfx of camera turning off)
Lara: What! Seems like even Black-san is acting weird… Hey Pao Pa—no no… I can’t keep relying on Pao Pao… I need to figure this out by myself…
Pao Lin: (distant) Hey! Did you call my name?
Lara: Eeek!?
(footsteps sfx)
Lara: Mmmmm…nnmm…noooo? (in pain) Everything is…okay!
Pao Lin: You don’t look okay though.
Lara: Huh?
Pao Lin: What’s up? What’s wrong?
Lara: But… It’s not good for me to rely on Pao Pao for answers all the time so…
Pao Lin: Don’t worry about that~. We’re buddies so rely on me more. I would hate it if you didn’t depend on me anymore. All La-chan has to do is save me when I need help, right? So let’s rely on each other.
Lara: Okay.
Pao Lin: So, what happened?
Lara: Things kinda got…uncomfortable this time… And it’s probably my fault so…
Pao Lin: I see. Then I guess we’ve gotta use a Huang trump card~
Lara: You have something like that!?
Pao Lin: I promised to help you, right? Just leave it to me!!
Lara: Okay!
–
(ding dong)
(door opens)
Thomas: I think a remote call loses its meaning if you show up at my place in person.
Subaru: Yeah but like, you seemed uncomfortable so.
Thomas: About our first paycheck?
Subaru: Cat was worried that maybe you’re mad.
Thomas: I just don’t want to talk about the past. We seemed to be going in that direction…
Subaru: I know. But have you really not used any of your paychecks?
Thomas: Yeah. I’ve never used money on anyone. I was saving most of my paychecks to fix Ruby’s foot.
Subaru: Ah I see. Have you talked to her since?
Thomas: …
Subaru: Ah man, I knew it.
Thomas: I’m not used to…sending messages without a purpose…
Subaru: Hmm then… Invite her out to a meal.
Thomas: Eh?
Subaru: Treat her to some good food and make that the first time you’ve spent your hero money on someone else!
Thomas: …
Subaru: I bet that meal will taste so good! And it’ll become an unforgettable memory, like the ones Cat and I have.
Thomas: …
Subaru: So go get a meal as siblings!
Thomas: … You’re right.
Subaru: Hehe, yup!
Thomas: … I didn’t expect the meaningless remote get-together would end like this.
Subaru: Riiiight? You wouldn’t have been able to figure out how to talk to Ruby if I didn’t drag you into this get-together~ So be grateful to me!
Thomas: I need to say my thanks to Cat as well.
Subaru: Alright!! That means that we’re resuming the remote get-together call then!!
Thomas: Yeah.
–
Subaru: Hello? Cat? We’re back~ … Cat? Cat? Hey!
Thomas: That’s strange…
Subaru: Her camera is on but… Why isn’t she answering? Hey? Hello? Anyone there!?
(ding dong coming through both ends of the call)
Subaru and Thomas: Huh?
Subaru: Someone’s at your door.
Thomas: I’m sure it’s coming from you.
(ding dong)
Subaru: I think…it’s coming from the both of us.
Thomas: Eh?
(door opens)
Lara: Tada!
Thomas: Cat!?
Pao Lin: Surprise!
Subaru: And even Kid!? Why are you here?
Pao Lin: La-chan told me how uncomfortable you two were acting so I brought some Huang-special dumplings!
Lara: Pao Pao said that we’ll get along if we eat dumplings together so we decided to deliver some!
Subaru: Hehe thanks for that. But there’s no point for that now.
Lara and Pao Lin: Huh?
Thomas: What was the point in a remote call if you two come here in person?
Lara and Pao Lin: !?
Pao Lin: Sorry…
Subaru: So this is the ‘careless’ that Cat mentioned.
Thomas: Seems so.
Subaru: Come on, Kid!
Pao Lin: Hmm, guess we’ll hand over the dumplings and go back.
Lara: Yeah.
Thomas: Please wait.
Lara, Pao Lin, and Subaru: Huh?
Thomas: Why not eat the dumplings together, especially when you came all the way here.
Pao Lin: Eh?
Thomas: It won’t be as tasty if it goes cold.
Lara, Pao Lin, and Subaru: Woooow!!
Thomas: Huh? Why are you looking at me like that?
Lara: It’s just— unlike you to say that.
Subaru: Yeah!
Thomas: Then forget I said that.
Pao Lin: Eh!? No no! It’s a great idea! Right, Black?
Subaru: Yeaaaaah! Let’s have a dumpling party!!
Lara: Alright!
Thomas: I won’t be eating any though.
Lara, Pao Lin, and Subaru: Huh?
Thomas: It’s not like you prepared dumplings with chicken breasts and broccoli.
Subaru: Aaah, sorry that he’s so strict with his—
Pao Lin: I made some.
Subaru and Thomas: Eh?
Pao Lin: I made sure to make some just for you, Thomas. So don’t worry about it!
Lara and Subaru: (clapping) Wow!!
Subaru: I think I understand what Cat meant by ‘Pao Pao is my pride and joy’ now.
*Zàijiàn = goodbye in Cantonese and Mandarin